


LIES

by magnumopustron



Series: Just A Kid From Brooklyn [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America: The First Avenger - Fandom, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Howard Stark is a Douche Bag, M/M, PIV Sex, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Trans Steve Rogers, Transgender, Transgender man, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-09
Updated: 2015-08-09
Packaged: 2018-04-13 20:36:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4536468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magnumopustron/pseuds/magnumopustron
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Howard Stark has always had a hard time admitting when he's wrong about something. Steve has a hard time letting go of things that aren't good for him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	LIES

**Author's Note:**

> In-fic song is “A Fine Romance” by Billie Holiday.  
> Steve refers to his sexual organs as “girl parts” because he lives in the 1940s and terms like 'ftm' didn't really exist. No offense is meant to any transgender men.

  
“You only ever touch me in the dark  
Only if we're drinking can you see my spark  
And only in the evening could you give yourself to me  
Because the night is your woman  
and she sets you free”

LIES by Marina and the Diamonds

* * * 

It was easy at first.

Howard Stark would show up in his swanky car and pick Steve up for a night on the town.

“Might as well have some fun!” he'd say. “Before... you know.”

Howard would always wink as he said this, but Steve heard something else under the words; this tone like Howard thought he was gonna die or something. Like he was goin' to the electric chair. Maybe Howard just meant since he was going to war and all or how his body would be different once it was over. That was just weird though, because it sounded like Howard thought Steve wouldn't _want_ to go out on the town once he was a big guy.

He always imagined how Bucky would react if he were there. He'd be on the moon about a car like this, probably begging Howard to let him drive.

Usually they just had a drink at a bar. Howard would put his arm around Steve's shoulders, shaking him a little, playfully, that mysterious smile playing on the engineer's lips. Then one night, things changed.

 

* * *

It took him a while, riding in silence as they headed down the road, for the blonde to notice how his new friend was eyeing him.

Bucky would have been too busy sticking his head out the window and whistling at dames to notice.

Steve looked up and could have sworn he caught Howard eyeing him. He thought he'd just imagined it, but after a few minutes he glanced again and he saw the inventor look away, back at the road ahead.

It made him feel a little nervous at first, shifting in his seat. Howard Stark was a suave guy – making a lot of money with his inventions. He was smart and pretty popular with the dames it seemed. Steve didn't realize what Howard's glances meant until he looked and felt the taller man's eyes burning into his.

His skin flushed hot and he looked down at his knees. Bony. Why was Howard looking at him that way? Didn't he realize how small Steve was? How scrawny?

God, but he hoped Stark wasn't _interested_ in him that way. He silently prepared himself to give what he'd started to think of as 'The Speech'; 'I'm not interested in being your _girl,_ your little _wife_. I'm a man, please treat me like one of the guys.'

He looked up and noticed Howard was watching the road again – thank God. Steve tried to calm his breathing.

Tonight, they stopped in front of a nice club – the valet taking Howard's car. Steve followed in a daze, looking around at all the dames in dresses and fancy hats, the guys in suits like Howard's. He was just wearing his army uniform.

“Come on, handsome,” Howard winked at him, smiling a little.

Steve could have punched him as he walked in beside the engineer.

“What the hell, Howard?” he growled under his breath. “You coulda told me this place was fancy.”

“Hey, I said we were going out. I didn't say where,” Howard smirked at him in that way that got Steve's heart fluttering.

'It's just Howard Stark,' he thought. 'Calm down. He's just your buddy Howard.'

Besides, he shouldn't be thinking of anyone when Bucky was the guy he'd dreamed of for _years_. Even if Buck didn't know how Steve felt, what if he was on a battlefield somewhere, getting shot at while Steve caroused with some smooth guy back in New York?

Not that Howard returned his feelings, surely.

His temperature rose when he felt Howard's hand brushing against his as they walked in and Stark was greeted enthusiastically by the host who led them to their table. The club had a dance floor down some steps, slightly lower than the level where the tables were. A stage was in the center back of the dance floor; a colored woman was singing.

“ _You're calmer than the seals_

_in the Arctic Ocean_

_At least they flap their fins_

_to express emotion...”_

Howard smiled as he greeted was felt to Steve like every other person at the lounge. Apparently he was a frequent favorite here. A woman whose neck was nearly covered in diamonds – real? Steve couldn't tell - received kisses on both cheeks from him, laughing, her partner grinning at Howard having just shared a firm hand shake.

“So good to see you, Lisa dear!” He winked at her. “That twin of yours in town?”

“Oh shut _up_ ,” she laughed, putting her hand on his chest like he was such a card. She smiled at Steven. “Who is this?”

“This is Steve Rogers, a good friend of mine,” Howard tossed an arm around his shoulders like they were old pals. Steve couldn't resist the slight frown, which he quickly exchanged for a lukewarm smile to the woman. “Steve, this is Lisa and Mack Baldridge.”

“Nice to meet you,” he took her offered hand, bobbing his head, then shook hands with the man who nearly crushed Steve's slight hand and gave him a once over that clearly said what he was thinking; 'They let anybody in these days, huh?'

As soon as they left, Steve felt more relaxed, his face burning hot.

“Why are you tomato red?” Howard murmured in his ear, making his throat tighten. The engineer had kept his arm around Steve's shoulders, causing him to stiffen. “Here, let's get you some water.”

Their table was to the right of the stage, hidden slightly by thick drapes, in a dark corner. The table itself was circular, the plush seat curving with the corner. Howard released him and Steve sat nervously toward the end – or was about to when he was playfully bumped along further toward the center by the inventor who scooted in next to him.

He tried to give Howard some distance but Stark seemed content to sit right up against him, arm around him again.

“What can I get for you?” the host was all smiles.

“Just the usual for me and my old pal!”

“Sure thing! I'll be back in a moment!”

“I give him good tips,” Howard explained, taking out a silver case. He released Steve to open it, pull out a thin cigarette, tuck it between his lips, and light it. The glow of the lighter highlighted his cheek bones and large, dark eyes.

Steve swallowed, looking toward the stage where the colored woman was smiling at the audience and bowing her head in appreciation of the applause. Her dress was a bright blue that rippled like ocean waves; at least, he thought it was a bright blue. Steve was colorblind. He started to clap along when he felt a hand turn his chin.

Howard smiled at him, releasing the smoke into a little cloud that drifted away. Something about seeing it dissipate from Howard's lips...

Steve swallowed, but fortunately his gulp wasn't audible.

Howard's eyes reminded him of the cigarette's cherry the way they burned at him. The tomato color rose in his cheeks and he turned away to grab the pitcher of water on the table and pour it into a glass. Howard chuckled as Steve took a long drink of the water.

“Oh good, wine's here!” he grinned as the waiter arrived.

“Only the best for Howard Stark and his special guest.”

Steve was surprised that there was no disgust in the waiter's tone. Suddenly his body caught up with his thoughts and he felt a shiver over his skin. He waited to speak until the waiter had opened it for them and was gone.

“Here you go, Steve – and no, don't tell me you won't have any cause you _will!_ ” Howard chuckled around the cigarette clamped in his lips, taking it with his fingers a moment later to exhale more smoke as he poured the wine into a glass. It smelled heady, rich.

“No.” Steve shook his head.

“Well tough. You're having a glass _anyway_ ,” Howard good naturedly poured his own full to the grim, then set the bottle down in the pail of ice it had arrived in.

Steve glared down at the white table cloth. The singer had retired from the stage, her dress rippling as she walked. Now the band was picking up, playing something jaunty.

“Why'd you bring me here, Howard?” He looked up, settling his glare on the other man. “And tell me the truth.”

“I just wanted to have a good time with you, Steve,” Howard purred, releasing smoke again. He didn't blow it, he just opened his mouth and let it escape in a white cloud, then exhaled slowly. Steve felt it caress his face, inhaling.

He started coughing.

“Shit. Sorry. I forgot.” He started to put the cigarette out in the ashtray but Steve held up a hand.

“Give it to me,” he wheezed.

“Hell no.”

“Give me the goddamn cigarette, Stark.” He glowered with watery eyes. An unspoken 'please' still somehow hung in the air and it irked Steve.

“Fine,” Stark sighed, handing it to him. Steve took a drag, breathing deep, then releasing it with a cough. “But if you die of an attack, it's on _you!_ Not me... And I'm _not_ gonna be the one to tell Erskine.”

“I'm not gonna have an attack,” Steve coughed once more. Even if the cigarettes made him cough, he liked them. Buck would usually give him crap, call him a hypocrite for all the times Steve had glared at him for lighting up one in his apartment. Steve liked the buzz of a cigarette after all. It embarrassed him that he had to smoke asthma cigarettes instead of the regular ones.

“You're adorable,” Howard smiled slowly, prompting another glare. This just made the man chuckle, infuriatingly. “Now have some wine, blondie.” He reached for the cigarette and Steve relinquished it, feeling oddly intimate once he saw it connect with Howard's lips again. Well, Howard had already had his lips on it, hadn't he?

That made Steve redden again as he took a sip of the wine. It tasted fine, better than any wine he'd ever had. Buck worked as a bus boy at a joint like this once and used to sneak stuff home, but nothing like the contents of this bottle.

“You like it?” Howard purred as if he knew. He always had this attitude like he could see right through Steve, right into his head. It drove the smaller man crazy. He wondered if it was on account of Howard's being an engineer that he could read people so easily – like looking into a machine and being able to picture all the parts inside working together.

“It's good,” he admitted, eyes on the tablecloth again. Howard chuckled.

Another woman was singing, this one wearing a red dress that matched her lipstick. Her wavy dark hair made him think of Agent Carter. Peggy. Steve didn't feel right using her first name yet. She was a superior officer, after all, and he was sure she didn't always get the respect she deserved in the military.

Steve let the music wash over him. The wine must be working fast, he thought as he took another sip, because he was starting to feel more relaxed already. Howard's free hand massaging the back of his neck and his shoulder felt nice too.

That's when his eyes nearly popped out of his head and he breathed in softly but sharply, the haze of smoke drifting over him, diving deep into his lungs.

Howard's clever, slightly calloused fingers were gently but firmly massaging the tendons in his neck. He tried not to picture those fingers elsewhere, his lips trembling. He looked up to see Howard watching the woman sing, his expression odd. He looked as if he was calculating, analyzing something, eyes bright and keen.

Then those eyes returned to Steve, a smile dimpling Howard's cheeks, and the smaller man's heart dropped into his stomach.

That was when Howard leaned in and kissed him, smoke escaping between their lips. Steve was stiff at first, but then curiously began to return the kiss, parting his own lips to greet Howard's tongue.

The way the mustache drifted over his upper lip, tickling Steve's lips, made him shiver a little. A smile tugged at his lips even as the kiss continued. Howard's hand was still at the back of his neck, thumb caressing his ear.

“Very nice,” Howard purred, wry smile gleaming in the dark like his eyes. Steve felt like those eyes were burning straight into him. They gleamed the way eyes always did in the novels he read. He'd never really thought people's eyes could do stuff like that, 'cept Bucky's. Then he met Agent Carter and now Howard...

Those dark eyes were back on his lips and Howard was biting his own lower lip. Slowly they burned a trail back up to Steve's gaze.

“I wanna see what you got under that uniform before it changes.” His voice was husky.

All the hairs on Steve's body rose and he swallowed. He stared. There was a tiny voice in his mind wondering why the hell he didn't just get up and punch Howard right in his stupid smug face then walk away. If only his heart wasn't hammering so fast. He took a deep breath, quietly releasing it and trying not to have an attack.

It was just that... Well it'd been such a long time since Steve kissed someone.

“O-Okay.”

'Don't forget the wine too,' he could have sworn _that_ thought was in Bucky's voice.

Howard grinned.

“I'm gonna have so much fun with you,” he whispered, putting the cigarette between Steve's lips, brushing a thumb over his lower lip as he did.

Steve was bright red as he looked down, taking a drag on the cigarette. He could see Howard's smile out of the corner of his eyes. When he coughed, Howard gently rubbed his back, and his ears felt hot.

* * *

 

Their first time was in Howard's apartment that night.

Stark sat on the edge of his bed while Steve stood between his knees and allowed the other man to unbutton his uniform shirt, tossing it aside carelessly. He smiled at the plain white undershirt, chuckling as he looked into Steve's eyes. Then a hand slid up his chest, palm flat, until it stopped over the center, right near Steve's heart. Steve's chest was a bit damp with sweat and he felt embarrassed. He knew Howard could feel his pulse and he swallowed as he looked into those dark eyes, swearing he could see straight down into some coals in Hell.

“Take it off,” Howard plucked at the undershirt, not taking his eyes away.

Steve obeyed, skin prickling as he did. Howard licked his lips, looking over the blonde's narrow chest and smiling a little. His lips parted in a soundless gasp when callous fingers plucked at a nipple and he felt his face heat again. Steve tried not to think about how long it had been since he'd last had release. He felt like the rusty pipes of the sink in his apartment before he went to Camp Leigh; like just a few taps with a hammer would cause him to burst.

Howard's finger trailed down the center of his chest, down his belly, to the button of his pants. He plucked the button free, then tugged the zipper down slowly.

Steve's pants fell and he wanted to die as Howard's eyes roved down over the bulge in his underwear, over his skinny legs.

Ugh, god he was so bony and disgusting, why...

Howard giggled when he pressed a finger against the bulge. It gave easily, Steve blinking and looking away, wanting to choke.

“Socks, huh?” he smiled. “What size socks are they?”

“My size,” Steve answered, his eyes narrowing. As if he'd take somebody else's socks and put them in his pants!

Howard reached up and gently seized his chin but Steve could have sworn his grip was iron.

“What size?” he whispered, breath hot against Steve's chest.

“Six,” Steve answered.

Howard smiled, but it was affectionate. He grinned deviously as his fingers slipped into Steve's underwear.

Steve wanted to stop him, to plead, to beg – he still had his boots on, and his pants were hanging out around his ankles, maybe they should clean up first- and Howard must have seen the fear in his eyes because he halted, fingers settling around the socks.

“Hey,” he murmured and swallowed, suddenly looking strangely young. “It's okay, buddy.”

Buddy. Steve closed his eyes and sighed.

Howard tugged the socks free, giggling and wiggling them at Steve when he opened his eyes. He couldn't resist giving the engineer a raised eyebrow as Howard tossed the socks aside. Then he was being tugged down into Howard's lap and kissed firmly.

“Mm, baby,” Stark growled, shoving them both sideways, down onto the bed. Steve murmured a little in protest; his shoes. “I got it, cookie.”

He blushed at the term. Geez, Howard just knew how to keep him bright red. The engineer leaned in and inhaled the scent at Steve's neck, humming.

“Are you wearing _aftershave?_ ” he chuckled.

“Yeah?” Steve felt his face flame. “So what?”

Howard smiled as he sat up and shook his head, then worked on his boots, tugging them off, then tossing them away. He inspected one for a moment, smiling and shaking his head.

“Where'd they find boots your size?” he murmured.

“Shut up,” came the reply that made him laugh. Steve couldn't resist smiling a little at it.

Howard tugged on a sock playfully.

“This is where you put your socks, young man.”

“Can it already.”

Chuckling, Howard yanked them off, tickling the sole of Steve's foot until he was kicked.

“Ow! Hehe... all right, you.”

His pants were snatched completely off and then Howard was on top of him, kissing deeply and moaning. His fingers slid into Steve's hair, gripping him and keeping him in place. One hand slid down over his throat, gently squeezing. If Steve'd had a cock, it would be pressing up against Howard like a flag pole by now for sure.

Howard broke off the kiss, sitting up, yanking his own jacket off, and tossing it aside. His eyes burned down at Steve as all pretense of suave was gone, his fingers quickly fumbling to yank his own tie free, then unbutton his shirt. Steve reached out to help him and had his hands swatted away.

“Oh no baby, you just lie there and look beautiful.”

Steve swallowed and obeyed. Something about Howard's words made him both warm and cold at the same time.

“Oh yes sirree,” the man growled as he tossed his shirt away. Steve barely had a chance to see his lean chest and arms corded with wiry muscle before he was leaning over Steve like a panther, one hand near Steve's head, the other firmly pressing down over his chest and belly. “Goddamn,” he breathed as his finger and thumb plucked at the same nipple from before. Fortunately, Steve's breasts were small enough that he didn't really have to wrap them to make them flat.

The blonde closed his eyes, breathing shallowly. If anything was gonna give him an attack, it was Howard's hot eyes.

Then the inventor was leaning in, breathing against his neck, planting kisses. Steve groaned, desperate to feel those fingers moving lower already.

“You touch yourself, baby?” Howard's voice was unrecognizable – a throaty growl that made his spine prickle.

“Ah. Y-yeah.”

“Mmm,” Howard's mouth was hot on his neck, fogging his brain. “When did you last...?”

“Uh...”

His chin was gripped, face turned to Howard's.

“Tell me.”

“I um... a week ago? I think.”

“Mm, what did you think about?” Howard's other hand slid down into his underwear and Steve gasped, tensing.

“Mm...” Bucky. He'd thought of Bucky as he often did, kissing his neck, biting his ear, licking. Bucky's hands massaging him, Bucky's fingers pressing in. Bucky groaning and promising to fuck him so hard he'd feel it the next day. “Being fucked. Hard.”

“Oh _god yes_ , baby,” Howard hissed as his fingers reached the curly hair above Steve's mound. He closed his eyes when he felt the fingers slide over the moist lips, the middle one brushing over the sensitive bud at the front. “Mm, don't worry. I'm gonna fuck you until you can't scream anymore.”

Steve shivered and bucked as the middle finger teased the button while the others brushed over the lips.

“Oh god, Howard.” His voice was breaking, a little of the mezzo peeking out from under his imposed tenor.

“Yeah baby,” Howard smiled at him. “That feels good, huh?”

“Yeah,” Steve's hands trembled on his shoulders. He hadn't been touched like this since Bucky and he were teenagers and his friend was curious about girl parts. It had ended too quickly, nowhere near satisfying and had been part of what led Steve to touching himself to release the pressure. He'd come by his own fingers countless times but never by someone else's.

Tears pricked at his eyes, both at the pleasure and at the thought of Bucky. How much he ached to have his friend lying over him like this, pressed down against his chest. Steve wouldn't have minded being his girl, in bed, in the dark. Bucky's hot breath against his near and neck, hearing his groans.

' _Stevie, baby you feel so good_.'

But he'd never told Buck about these feelings.

He opened his eyes, turning his head to face Howard who looked at him with a slight frown, his fingers slowing.

“You okay, sweetheart?”

He smiled at the endearment, face flushing slightly.

“Yeah,” he nodded, dazed by the pleasure. “Feels amazing.”

Howard smiled, looking smug, and licked his lips, then they were kissing again. Howard's kiss was teasing then bruising all at once. Steve loved the way his lips were both bit and sucked. He rolled his hips, groaning when Howard murmured and cursed in approval. Long fingers curved and slipped inside of him, making him gasp and toss his head back.

“Is that okay?”

“Y-yeah...” Steve nodded, shivering. It hurt a little, but it was a good kind of hurt. Then Howard was moving his fingers shallowly as his thumb brushed against the mound. Steve wondered how he knew about the button. Maybe cause he'd been with so many dames.

He blushed, thinking that he was just another dame to Howard Stark, but the way the man's eyes burned into his face hungrily aroused him to no end.

“You're so nice and wet for me, huh, Steve...” The blonde's skin prickled at the obscene words. He nodded. “How long you been wet for me, huh baby?” The thumb pressed against his button and Steve groaned, rocking his hips.

“Mn, since we kissed.”

“Yeah, that's right.” Howard whispered. “You're mine, aren't you?”

Steve nodded, despite the tiny voice that screamed 'No!' that he was wrong, that Bucky was the one for him, nobody else. But he was Howard's, at least, for tonight.

Then those fingers were pressing up, brushing against something inside of him and he was calling out, hips rolling faster.

“Ah, ah, oh god!”

He nearly sobbed when Howard's fingers slipped out a moment later. The man smirked.

“Uh-uh. You don't come til I get inside. Isn't that right?”

Steve huffed, shivering with need.

“Hurry up already.”

Howard grinned. “Good boy.”

He would have taken it as mocking but the taller man's eyes were still burning like coals, hot and slow.

Howard tugged his undershirt off and threw it away, then wriggled out of his pants, underwear included, kicking off his shoes.

“I can't wait to get inside of you...” he grinned slowly, reminding Steve of Bucky. Except Bucky's smile had always been so carefree and Howard's was just hungry in that way Steve couldn't define. Now naked, Howard's body was completely visible to Steve; healthy tan skin, stray dark curls on his chest, some leading down his belly toward his cock. Steve swallowed as he eyed it almost enviously; thick and heavy, pointing straight between his parted knees.

Howard smirked as he moved down between Steve's legs, arms wrapping around his thighs.

“You keep still,” he growled. Steve frowned.

“What are you-”

“What did I say?”

Steve swallowed, gripping at the sheets. He lowered his head against the pillows, blue eyes slitted down at Howard. They opened wider when he watched the grinning mouth part to let his tongue slide up, between the lips.

“Oh god,” he breathed, eyes closing. Holy Moses, but Howard Stark was a _nasty_ son of a bitch! His toes curled and he whined, hips tensing with the effort as Howard's tongue licked a circle around his entrance. His eyes glazed and he gasped as he felt the tongue teasing the nub. Howard alternated between flicking it quickly then slowly brushing his tongue down over Steve's entrance.

“Oh please,” he groaned.

“Please what?” Howard murmured, rubbing his cheek against Steve's thigh like a cat marking something.

“F-Fuck me, already!” His patience snapped. “Please.”

“Good boy,” Howard gently tugged the skin on his thigh between his teeth, releasing it as their eyes met. “You are such a good boy for me, Steve.”

The blonde couldn't resist a whine and Howard chuckled as he crawled up the bed again.

“You taste so sweet,” he purred, pressing his lips against Steve's before the smaller man could protest.

Steve was shocked at first, but then he returned the kiss. Was that... was he tasting himself on Howard's tongue?

Fuck. They were both going _straight_ to hell.

Steve panted when Howard broke the kiss, smirking down at him.

“Is this your first time?” The engineer's dark eyes searched his. The blonde head shook in response. He'd had Bucky's fingers before. Then there was the landlord of his apartment. He never told Buck about it, but he hadn't been able to make rent one time so Steve offered what he did have. He didn't enjoy it but at least it was over quickly.

“Good,” Howard breathed. “Don't have to be all delicate.”

Steve huffed. He'd heard Bucky say guys were 'sposed to be careful with girls the first time and Buck had been very careful with him when they fooled around. But Steve had always hated the idea that Buck thought of him as a _girl_ and furthermore the idea that he had to be _careful_ with Steve.

“It's fine, Howard.”

The inventor leaned in and gave him a slow kiss, then pushed his thighs up.

“There we go, that's my good boy.” Steve shivered at the praise again, feeling warm in his chest. Howard's body was hot against his, beads of sweat on the other man's forehead. Steve liked that he could have this effect on the other man. He thought of a teenage Bucky, sweaty from a game of baseball with their pals, kissing Steve at first with gentle pecks, then timidly prying with his tongue until Steve met it with his own. Back when they were two stupid kids who didn't know how dangerous it was for two boys to kiss. Steve had always had a pretty easy time of passing for a boy, albeit a very scrawny one.

Howard's kisses were sharper, devouring, and made Steve feel breathless but in a good way. As if every breath of his was being swallowed by the other man.

“Mm, just a moment!” The man pulled away and fumbled over to a bedside table with a drawer. He dug through the drawer and grinned as he pulled out a paper envelope. Steve felt like an idiot for not thinking of such a thing himself! He almost felt grateful that Howard had thought of it, but then he was reminded why the man had prophylactics lying around.

The engineer smirked as he moved back to lie over Steve and began to kiss him again, then got up on his knees to slip a condom over his cock. Steve watched curiously, both bemused and slightly sorry for Howard's cock. It didn't look like condoms were very comfortable.

“There we go...”

Then Howard was kissing him again and tugging at his nipples and he groaned. He tensed when he felt the head pressing against him and trembled, spreading his legs wider.

“It's okay, baby,” Howard whispered, sitting up on his knees, one hand on Steve's belly, the other holding up one leg. “I'm gonna go real slow at first, all right?”

Steve nodded, then fought a grimace when he felt the head pressing in. He took a deep breath, trying to relax his body.

'Come on, relax already,' he thought of the landlord and closed his eyes tightly, pushing the image away.

“Hey. You okay?” He felt Howard's hand sliding up and down his thigh, gently bringing him back and he nodded. A whimper escaped when the taller man's hips pressed forward again and his head entered Steve fully. It felt good though it stung a little. He reached down with a hand to rub against the nub and Howard gently brushed it away. Steve made a soft noise of protest.

“I got it baby,” Howard breathed, his eyes heavy lidded now as he brushed a thumb over it. Steve gasped, his thighs tightening, and the other man chuckled. “That's right, sweetheart. Gonna make you feel so good.” A growl, and Steve was being stretched further. He closed his eyes and groaned.

It felt so much better with Howard touching the little nub. He just wished Buck was the one doing this now.

'Stop,' he thought. 'Stop being such a sap!'

“Mm, God that is so good,” Howard's eyes were closed and he was tilting his head back. Steve could feel him throbbing inside and gasped, squirming. “Ugh, god, if you don't stop I'm not gonna last,” the inventor chuckled, leaning forward carefully to plant a kiss on Steve's lips, hand moving to plant beside his lover's head.

Steve whined at the loss of touch and rubbed up against Howard.

“Mm, so impatient,” the brunette growled, hefting Steve's thigh up further. “Just like I like 'em.”

He couldn't stop moaning as Howard began to rock against him slowly. The dark eyes watched him under heavy lids as the pace picked up, a tongue darting out over dark lips. Muttered praise and promises made Steve's face redden again.

He gasped as Howard began to plow him, harder, faster, brushing against his inner walls in a way that was making him want to cry. Steve nearly sobbed as he tightened his legs around Howard's waist, pulling him closer.

“Ugh! Oh god, yes!”

He would have been mortified if he hadn't felt so amazing, unable to help the way his voice broke. He needed more and he needed it right then.

“Good boy,” Howard breathed a laugh against his neck, kissing his ear. “That's right!”

Steve cried out, reaching down again to stroke himself. His whole body seized up, then shattered between Howard and the bed.

“Ohh... oh god,” he gazed up at the ceiling in a daze, shivering. Howard kept rocking his hips then grunted a few moments later. Steve watched his face as he momentarily grit his teeth and his eyes shut tightly, then his face seemed to relax all at once, bliss written over his eyes as he opened them. The fire in his gaze dulled but it was replaced with a sleepy satisfaction and the corner of Howard's lips curled into a smirk.

“Mm, thank you sweetheart.” Howard slowly pulled out, causing Steve to hum quietly. He still felt as if he could have more and more. He reached up to tug Howard down with him and the inventor laughed.

“I gotta go to the bathroom, doll. But I'll be back,” a kiss was pressed to his forehead and Steve released his prisoner, arms flopping to the bed. He knew he must look pretty comical and Howard chuckled at him, shaking his head as he got up from the bed, naked. Steve swatted at his butt as he walked away, but the inventor just laughed and wiggled it at him. He envied the taller man's confidence, how he practically danced to the bathroom, not ashamed of his nude, pale body in the slightest.

He sat up long enough to yank up the covers and wiggle under them with a happy sigh, rolling onto his side. The sheets weren't fancy, but they were comfortable. With a yawn, he realized he hadn't really paid much attention to the room and looked around. The furniture looked older, but it was nice.

“You're out already?” Howard emerged from the bathroom, shaking his head and tisking. He returned to the bed with a bottle in his hand and a fresh cigarette on his lips. Steve grumbled as he was jostled by the enthusiastic man wriggling into the sheets and giggling. “Gonna wake you up in a few hours so we can go again, baby,” he felt Howard's mustache tickle his ear and brushed at it with a murmur, like swatting a gnat away. The inventor smacked his butt through the covers.

“Hey, I'm talking to you! Ungrateful little punk.”

“M'tired.”

“Oh you're gonna be tired tomorrow,” Howard grinned around his cigarette, popping the cork from the bottle and laughing as he moved to catch the escaping booze with his tongue.

“Champagne?” Steve opened his eyes to see a bottle wiggled at him and sighed, sitting up for a moment.

Steve took the bottle and took a swig, coughing a little and having to cover his mouth.

“Jeezus you are a lightweight,” Howard lit his cigarette, then tossed the zippo aside.

“You're gonna light this place on fire like that.”

“Nah, I closed it first.” He smirked and wriggled closer, putting an arm around Steve who allowed himself to lean into the man. “Look at you, huh? All radiant and glowing.”

“Shut up,” Steve pushed the bottle into his hands and Howard laughed. The cigarette was passed to him as he was about to lie down and the smaller man took it. He coughed once again, but took another drag anyway, glaring at Howard who was shaking his head again.

“It's okay, angel eyes. I won't tell anybody your little secret.”

Steve sat up further, scowling.

“What secret?”

“That while you're a big man out there, you're my little pussy willow in the bedroom.”

Steve stared at him in disgust.

“What?”

In the next minute he was scrambling out of bed, the cigarette in his lips.

“ _Fuck you_ , Howard.”

“What!” Howard was watching him with those falsely wide eyes he used to express when he thought somebody was overreacting. He did that to Peggy all the time. Steve would have laughed at the memory of her grumbling that it made her want to slap him but he was too angry.

“Hey, where you goin?” The inventor sat up in the bed, watching the skinny young man grab his shirt and pants.

“Back to my room at the hotel. Don't worry. I'll call a cab.” Steve hopped into his pants, then snatched the cigarette from his own lips, coughing. He put it out in a silver ashtray on a small table nearby, then tugged his undershirt on.

“Oh don't be so dramatic! Get back in bed!”

“I think I'll pass,” the bright blue eyes of the soldier rolled as he searched for his socks and boots. He was a little sore, but mostly he just felt disgusted.

“Is it cause I called you a pussy willow?”

“Yes!” Steve turned to snarl at him. “Oh and you insinuated I'm only a man _out there_.”

“Oh _come on!_ ” Howard groaned. “What was I supposed to say?”

Steve just glared at him the way he did when he thought someone was being a prick and he hoped they'd realize it and stop.

“I called you a good _boy,_ ” Howard pointed out.

“You don't get it,” Steve grumbled, turning away sullenly to sit in a chair as he pulled his socks on.

“So that's it?” Howard stood, walking to the chair where he'd tossed his jacket and tugging his cigarette case free. “Wham, bam, thank you Mister Howard Stark?”

Steve shook his head, slipping his feet into boots. He scowled when he realized Howard was chuckling at his feet as he lit another cigarette.

“What is so damn funny?”

“Where'd they find combat boots your size, anyway?”

“My feet aren't actually _that_ _small_.”

Howard shook his head, chuckling some more. Suddenly, Steve hated him, almost with a bile in his throat. He hated Howard standing there naked, waving his stupid dick around and laughing around his fucking cigarette like he was such a big man.

“Fuck you!” Steve snarled, forsaking his belt. His boots were still half laced but he didn't even care. He stormed from the room, ignoring Howard's protests.

As he slammed the door to Stark's apartment and hurried down the stairs of the building, he cursed his own stupidity for sleeping with a man like Stark. Honestly, what did he think was going to happen?

Shame slowed his steps and he shook his head. How could he even call himself a man when he let someone like Howard...

Shaking his head, Steve brushed off his thoughts and decided not to think of that night anymore. He would go home and get some sleep. In the morning, he would take a shower, maybe have breakfast at the hotel with Agent Carter, then stop by and visit Bucky's folks. Mrs Barnes had invited him and promised to cook him a big dinner. Apparently they'd gotten a letter from Bucky recently.

Guilt washed over Steve; he hadn't written Buck lately. But he had his reasons. He hadn't yet told Bucky that he'd gotten into the army mainly because he knew he would get letters full of questions and Bucky would _worry_.

Steve scurried up the steps of the hotel where he, Carter, and Dr Erskine were staying. They each had their own rooms, which Steve thought was very generous since he could have shared a room with Erskine. They had shared a drink back at Camp Lehigh in the barracks, but then again, maybe Erskine wouldn't be comfortable sharing a room with Steve. The doctor seemed to respect that Steve identified as a man, but he still had a woman's body.

He scowled as he thought about Howard again, shaking his head. So stupid! Why had he done that? Why had he let Howard Stark sweep him off his feet? Like some silly _dame_. He was in the army now! What was wrong with him?

He rubbed a hand over his neck as he moved up a flight of stairs and then down a hall to his room, quickly unlocking the door. He could still feel the brush of Howard's lips and mustache over his neck.

Maybe he would take a shower tonight before bed, even if it was already pretty late.

He fumbled with the key, cursing softly.

The door to the room next to his opened and a curly dark head poked out.

“Steven?”

He stopped, eyes widening, feeling oddly caught as he looked up. Agent Carter's lovely brown eyes regarded him curiously. She was wearing a silky pale blue robe that covered her and made her look like an angel. His cheeks burned and he wondered if she could smell Howard's cologne on him, if she could see written all over his face what Steve had done with the man.

“Agent Carter.”

“Oh honestly,” she rolled her eyes but she smiled a little. “You can call me Peggy, Steven.”

“Right,” he smiled slightly. “Sure.” He stopped fumbling with the door for a moment. “Erm. Can I get you anything?”

“I'm fine.” She smiled. “I was just...” She shrugged. “Did you have a good time with Howard?”

He choked, face going red and he began to fumble with the lock again.

“Uh, sure! It was swell. We went erm, to a nice club and there was music. It was very swell.”

“Well I'm glad to hear it. I know he can be awful sometimes,” she winked at him. “But-”

The door finally unlocked and swung slightly inward and Steve sighed in relief.

“Right,” he stood with one hand on the doorknob, looking down at the key in his hands, not wanting to be rude and just leave Peggy hanging out in the hallway. “He was... fine.” Steve nodded again. “I had a swell time. Thank you for asking.”

He looked up shyly and felt his heart twist as she smiled at him again.

“You're welcome. Well... I suppose I'll see you at breakfast?”

He had to be imagining the hopeful note in her voice. He had to.

“R-right,” he nodded, envying men like Howard and Bucky for their confidence, their ease with women like Agent Carter. Then again, he wasn't sure Bucky had ever met a woman like Peggy, but he didn't doubt Buck would have no problem chatting her up with his charming smile and his way with words. Steve still couldn't picture Peggy Carter swooning over someone though. “I look forward to it.”

Oh god, he sounded desperate didn't he? He heard Howard's voice in his mind ' _When did you last...?_ ' Steve wanted to be sick.

“Goodnight then,” her lips curved in a smile as she closed the door.

“Night,” he said softly to the hallway, then stepped in to his room, turning on a lamp. He shut the door and flopped onto his bed, on his back, looking up with a sigh at the ceiling. With a groan, he covered his eyes with an arm.

Why, oh _why_ did he sleep with Howard fucking Stark?

 


End file.
